Thursday, October 28, 2010
What Am I Truly Afraid of and Why?
The most pressing fear I hold is one that comes in many forms, and from many places, which is a big reason why it burns so heavily into my mind. This pressing fear in generally referred to as 'evil'. However general a term it may be, there are specific reasons as to why it is such a great fear of mine. Evil is a quality that can only be had by humans, with free will comes the possibility of evil; evil thoughts, beliefs, and actions. Specific examples of evil are debatable, and opinions can vary for a number of reasons, particularly religion, so for the sake of readers I will make the effort to filter out opinions that may pertain only to certain people. Moving back to the topic, considering that evil exists in human beings means to say that it also exists within myself, the first part of this fear. I try to be a good person, but sometimes it only takes one thought to remind myself of the evil that I am capable of, and it frightens me greatly. This is aside from evil actions I have already done, which serve as constant sources of regret, even though I can make all the excuses in the world for some of them. The possible presence of evil in those around me also beings about a stirring fear in me; the thought of evil that family, friends, and associates are also capable of circulates the fear I hold inside. Finally, there is the evil I see in the world as a whole, in people I've never met that effects other people I don't even know. The suffering that natural disasters cause is a source of sorrow for me, but when the same level of suffering is caused by humans, it begins to scare me. Why anyone could do the things I have heard sickens me to my core, and the fact that I am also capable of the same draws fear from my mind. I hate it with all my being, and I long for the day where I will no longer have to be afraid of myself, or anyone in the world because of evil, as slim as that possibility may be. Nevertheless, life goes on, and all I can do to fight this fear is doing everything possible to eliminate evil, starting with that which is present in myself. This could take an eternity, but either way I don't plan on hiding in a corner from my fears, it's just not my style.
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I think that this is a well processed self reflection. All humans are definitely capable of evil, and we see it everyday. looking around at the world we live in it is apparent that a few people loathe the prospect of change. Particullarily, those in comfortable positions. This is why we see people going to such great lengths to maintain their easy lifestyles even if what they are doing should drive them mad with guilt. From simple murders, to corporate America running the government with their lobbyists and cheque books, paying to go to war, to serve propaganda to the masses, to feed them war.
ReplyDeleteHey Ethan, your fear is one that many don't often think about but is one that everyone has to face at some point in their lives. I am glad that you brought up the idea of a very simple term but one that has so much meaning. I agree with you when you stated that evil is all around us whether we like it or not and everyone have some lurking inside. I believe that inner evil is the cause of many crises and disasters that happen on earth. Not only is evil something that can be hard to control, but it is something to be scared of. I am happy you have caught yourself when you have acted 'evil' as well because it's better to change sooner than later. Even though it is a very unlikely wish, I still hope we can one day see the world with no evil.
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